The father, surprised, answers, "Well, son, there are three kinds of breasts. In her 20's, a woman's breasts are like melons, round and firm. In her 30's to 40's, they are like pears, still nice but hanging a bit. After 50, they are like onions."
"Onions?" the son asked.
"Yes. You see them and they make you cry." the father replied.
This infuriated his wife and daughter so the daughter said, "Mum, how many kinds of 'willies' are there?"
The mother smiles and answers, "Well dear, a man goes through three phases.
In his 20's, his willy is like an oak tree, mighty and hard. In his 30's & 40's, it is like a birch, flexible but reliable. After he is 50+, it is like a Christmas tree."
"A Christmas tree?" the daughter asked.
"Yes, dear - dead from the root up and the balls are just for decoration."
"Yes, dear - dead from the root up and the balls are just for decoration."
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