Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Death row inmates denied health care

TERRE HAUTE, Ind. (AP) — Death row inmates at the federal prison in Terre Haute are routinely denied access to medical, dental and mental health care, the American Civil Liberties Union said Wednesday in a letter to a governmental official.
A year-long investigation by the ACLU's National Prison Project uncovered "grossly inadequate" conditions that "fail to meet constitutional standards and jeopardize the health and safety" of the more than 50 inmates awaiting execution at the prison, the organization said in a letter to Harley Lappin, director of the Federal Bureau of Prisons.
"The Constitution prohibits deliberate indifference to the serious medical needs of prisoners, including those sentenced to die," ACLU attorney Gabriel B. Eber said in a news release. He called on officials to "do whatever is necessary" to correct the problems.
Bureau of Prisons spokeswoman Felicia Ponce said she could not comment because she was not sure whether Lappin had seen the letter.
Eber said his investigation included interviews with prisoners and a review of hundreds of pages of prison records.
 
According to the letter, prison officials do not promptly respond to medical emergencies, provide "woefully deficient" access to acute health care and consistently ignore signs of possibly serious medical conditions. It cited one instance of an inmate, who was not identified, pressing an emergency call button in his cell for 45 minutes before receiving attention for a heart problem.
It took three hours for a doctor to arrive and for the prisoner to be taken to the prison hospital, and another five days before the prisoner received his first dose of medication prescribed by a cardiologist.
"The failure of prison officials to adequately respond to the medical emergencies of prisoners, and to ensure proper access to critical medications, is inexplicable and could well result in prisoner deaths," Eber said.
The letter also said inmates are subjected to intense noise that results in sleep deprivation and "significant psychological distress."

Sunday, October 12, 2008

These are REAL 911 Calls!

Dispatcher : 9-1-1 What is your emergency?
Caller: I heard what sounded like gunshots coming from the brown house on the corner.
Dispatcher: Do you have an address?
Caller:  No, I have on a blouse and slacks, why?
 

Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What is your emergency?
Caller :  Someone broke into my house and took a bite out of my ham and cheese sandwich .
Dispatcher : Excuse me?
Caller :  I made a ham and cheese sandwich and left it on the kitchen table and when I came back from the bathroom, someone had taken a bite out of it.
Dispatcher : Was anything else taken?
Caller :  No, but this has happened to me before and I'm sick and tired of it!
 

Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What is the nature of your emergency?
Caller:   I'm trying to reach nine eleven but my phone doesn't have an eleven on it.
Dispatcher: This is nine eleven.
Caller:    I thought you just said it was nine-one-one
Dispatcher: Yes, ma'am nine-one-one and nine-eleven are the same thing. Caller:    Honey, I may be old, but I'm not stupid.
 
My Personal Favorite!!!
 
Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What's the nature of your emergency?
Caller:    My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart Dispatcher: Is this her first child?
Caller:    No, you idiot! This is her husband!
 
And The Winner Is.....
 
Dispatcher: 9-1-1
Caller:   Yeah, I'm having trouble breathing. I'm all out of breath. Darn....I think I'm going to pass out.
Dispatcher: Sir, where are you calling from? Caller:   I'm at a pay phone. North and Foster.
Dispatcher: ! Sir, an ambulance is on the way. Are you an asthmatic?
Caller:   No
Dispatcher: What were you doing before you started having trouble breathing?....
Caller:   Running from the Police.

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Service

I became confused when I heard these terms with reference to the word 'service'.  

Internal Revenue   'Service'
U.S. Postal   'Service'
Telephone  'Service'
TV   'Service'   
Civil  'Service'
State, City & County  Public   'Service'
Customer  'Service'


This  is not what I  thought 'service' meant. But today, I overheard two farmers talking, and one of them said he had hired a bull to 'service' a few cows. BAM!!!  It all came into focus. Now  I understand what all those 'service' agencies are doing to us.  

I hope you are as enlightened as I am.

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Crazy Ol' Miner

See more funny videos at Funny or Die

A woman...

visited her plastic surgeon who told
her about a new procedure
called "The Knob," where a small knob is
placed at the top of the woman's
head and could be turned to tighten up her
skin and produce the effect of a
brand new face-lift. Of course, the woman
wanted "The Knob."

Over the course of the years, the woman
tightened the knob, and the
effects were wonderful, the woman remained
young looking and vibrant.
After fifteen years, the woman returned to
the surgeon with two problems.
"All these years, everything has been working
just fine. I've had to turn
the knob many times and I've always loved the
results. But now I've
developed two annoying problems: First, I have
these terrible bags under
my eyes and the knob won't get rid of them."

 The doctor looked at her closely and said,
"Those aren't bags, those are  your breasts."

 She said, "Well, I guess there's no point in
asking about the goatee."

 

Tuesday, September 09, 2008

what will you give

A driver is stuck in a traffic jam going into downtown Chicago .
Nothing is moving   
      north or south. Suddenly a man knocks on his window..

      The driver rolls down his window and asks, 'What happened, what's
the hold up?'     
      'Terrorists have kidnapped Barack Obama, Hillary Clinton,
Oprah
Winfrey
, Rosie       
      O'Donnell, Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton. They are asking for a
$10 Million ransom. 
      Otherwise, they are going to douse them with gasoline and set
them on fire. We are   
      going from car to car taking up a collection.'

      The driver asks, 'On average, how much is everyone giving?'



      ' About a gallon.'


 

Saturday, August 30, 2008

I'm voting for the first time in sixteen years...

I'm confident that I won't need one of these but if you are voting the Rebumlican ticket you might consider clickin on the image below...